COLOR AND EMOTIONAL RESPONSE
February 09, 2010
by WILLIAM NIGH
Scientists are finally figuring out what we’ve all known intuitively for years: colors reflect mood. Testing depressed and happy people for their response to colors across the spectrum, researchers found that happy people prefer yellow while gloomy Garys prefer blue and gray. Big surprise, right? People have successfully guesstimated the results of this study before.
Anywayz, maybe this new “discovery” will yield unexpected dividends, like an explanation for this. Probably not, but we can hope, right?
SOUTH CAROLINIAN SUBVERSIVES: REGISTER
February 09, 2010
by JAMES TENAFLY
If you’re living in South Carolina and you want to overthrow the government, please register with the Secretary of State. A new law in effect, not a proposed initiative, mind you, requires “subversives” in the Palmetto State to file with their state government under the Subversive Activities Registration Act. Quoth the act:
Title 23, Chapter 29 of the South Carolina Code of Laws requires that, “Every member of a subversive organization, or an organization subject to foreign control, every foreign agent and every person who advocates, teaches, advises or practices the duty, necessity or propriety of controlling, conducting, seizing or overthrowing the government of the United States, of this State or of any political subdivision thereof by force or violence or other unlawful means, who resides, transacts any business or attempts to influence political action in this State, shall register with the Secretary of State on the forms and at the times prescribed by him.”
What’s worse, the filing fee is a whole five bucks! And the punishment for noncompliance? $25,000 and/or 10 years in prison. It’s hard to tell if this law is technically Orwellian: It’s Draconian enough, sure, but it just seems too stupid to pass the Big Brother sniff test.
SWANSEA & ANTHRAX
February 09, 2010
by VBS STAFF
With the second wave of anthrax-laced heroin splashing up on the shores of the United Kingdom, it’s hard to think of a better time to unveil our travelog Swansea Love Story. In this dark portrait, the intrepid staff of Vice UK venture through the slums of Swansea, Wales, befriending teenage junkies and witnessing the economic decline tearing the sea-side town apart. You can’t imagine a place more fucked up by drugs and addiction. This place has 11-year-olds shooting up and teens turning to junk because they can’t find weed.
Check back this Friday, February 12th, to watch our documentary on Dylan Thomas’ “ugly little town.”
ALIENS POWER YOUTUBE
February 09, 2010
by MICHAEL FERRARE
I know this article seems a little goofy. Well, it is. But hold on, there might also be some important stuff in here. Now that we have rounded a decade, I think we should all agree that aliens power YouTube. The success of the following links and video content should be proof enough for you to believe.
The Top 100 Videos of 2000-2010
What makes most of this stuff successful is its authenticityl. Meaning an average person made it with their own hands— not in a studio. Sometimes all this user-generated content is really…stupid. Other times it’s really funny. Either way I’m sure we can all agree that most of it’s completely foreign and totally alien.
Read the rest on Motherboard.
BALD EAGLES IN HARLEM, COYOTES IN CENTRAL PARK
February 09, 2010
by JAMES TENAFLY
Who says you have to leave NYC to see the splendors of nature? Amidst the sewer steam, constant racket, and dirty snow residents of Harlem this weekend may have seen an adult female bald eagle with juvenile male companion. Not impressed by eagles? How about coyotes in Central Park and around Columbia?
All the unfamiliar fauna should have New Yorkers wondering whether this city’s on the cusp of a 12 Monkeys-esque apocalypse. Probably not: It looks like animal control is “dealing with” the coyotes after photos published in the New York Times distressed parents who believe the pups might devour their offspring.
THE GLASSING CAPITAL OF THE WORLD
February 09, 2010
by ANDY CAPPER
Drunk British people love smashing things into each other’s face so much that somebody has invented a new pint glass that won’t break even if you plunge it into some poor cunt’s face at 2 AM in the street outside a bar where you can get triple shots of spirits for £5. How much do Brits like me love casual acts of extreme violence? Well here’s something to take into account: There are 87,000 deliberate glassings a year in the UK, which is roughly 4,000 more glassings than America has gunshots, both intentional AND accidental.
If any non-Brits out there are shaking their heads in disbelief about the veracity of our barbarism, you can come out with me on a night out in any town or city you choose to name and see for yourselves why this happens.
Read the rest on viceland.
GAMBLING: NOT JUST FOR INDIANS
February 08, 2010
by VBS STAFF
Offshore gambling companies and poker websites rejoice! Pretty soon all your shady dealings will be legal thanks to the good people in the United States Congress. With the country still taking a huge reaming on the economic front and all that gambling revenue plump with wonderfully taxable dollars, how can the government resist legalizing and, of course, taking a massive chunk for itself?
Naturally, not everyone’s happy with the move. Both the National Football League, which apparently cannot make enough money, and Focus on the Family are afraid the push to legalize internet gambling will destroy the moral fabric of our society. You’re wondering how, but you shouldn’t. Obviously the new legislation will “encourage criminal activity, threaten children, and dramatically increase gambling addiction.” What is unknown: How it will work to unbalance your commitment to finding suitable pornography.
EVERYTHING YOU ENJOY WILL KILL YOU--EXCEPT FOR BEER, WHICH MAKES YOUR BONES HARD
February 08, 2010
by WILLIAM NIGH
First they took away our cigarettes, now they’re going after everything else. This week several studies have further ruined the joy of drinking soda and smoking pot while stupid shit like grapefruit has escaped judgment. Especially horrifying is that soda is causing pancreatic cancer in Singapore, maybe. You see, the researchers responsible for the study can’t tell if it’s all the delicious sugar that is actually causing cancer, or just the poor general health of pop-drinkers. Or even just the poor general health of Singapore.
As for pot, it’s looking like everyone’s favorite Canadian export can’t cure Alzheimer’s. Well, at least that one’s not too surprising. Who really thought that a drug known to ravage short term memory might cure a disease responsible for ravaging long term memory? Researchers at the University of British Columbia and Vancouver Coastal Health Research Institute, apparently. An early synthetic weed treatment worked to “reduce the toxicity of plaques and promoted the growth of new neurons,” or something. What’s more, studies looking at aging baby boomers are finding that ex-hippies have major health problems, possibly stemming from their smoky college years.
But then there is some good news too: Beer is good for your bones. Right here is where you guys offer up a bunch of dick jokes in the comments.
VERIZON VS. 4CHAN
February 08, 2010
by JAMES TENAFLY
There are few websites that can accurately be described as “dangerous,” and Verizon just fucked with one of them. For reasons that are sure to become clear in the next few days, Verizon’s decided to block 4chan. If you’re unfamiliar, 4chan’s the digital cesspool responsible, in equal parts, for the proliferation of LOLcats and child pornography across the world wide web. They also have a fairly hilarious war with the Church of Scientology. The board’s founder, moot, had this to say last night on 4chan’s blog:
“After an hour and a half on the phone, we’ve received confirmation from Verizon’s Network Repair Bureau (NRB) that we are “explicitly blocked.”
Last year AT&T blocked 4chan after a DDOS attack related to the site caused trouble for AT&T customers. It took 4chan a matter of hours to retaliate. One might assume a lil’ image board would be powerless in the face of a telecom giant, but 4chan’s campaign of harassment and hackery prompted a reversal of AT&T’s policies practically overnight. It’ll be interesting to see what’s left of Verizon when the dust settles.
DESCENDING SHADOWS BY PIERCED ARROWS IS OUT RIGHT NOW
February 08, 2010
by VBS STAFF
Hey everyone, we just put out a new record by Pierced Arrows, the new band of husband-wife duo Fred Cole and Toody Cole, the geniuses you know better as those geniuses who were in that band Dead Moon! And to celebrate we’re airing the extra special Dead Moon episode of Soft Focus where Ian sat them down for pints and a chat.
We’re beyond pleased to be putting out the first release by these living legends, Descending Shadows, and we’re urging YOU to buy it right now. This is 30 years of musical excellence, honed in the foggy hills of Portland, Oregon, on Fred Cole’s own vinyl lathe.
Also they are on tour. Consult this listing right away and if you live in or near any of the towns you see, you should make a point of showing up.
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